Tuesday, October 13, 2009


So, yeah, my life fucking sucks. Know how much it sucks? Read on...

Yesterday I intended to hit up the post office, and also Blockbuster (I recently tried, and subsequently canceled my membership - NetFlix is so, so, so, much better). Since I still have/had use of my brother's girlfriend's awesomely awful Saturn, I thought "hey me, this will be a piece of cake"!

Well, the stupid car had a flat. And I couldn't change it with only my left arm. So I did what I could and walked to the post office...and once there was reminded it was FUCKING COLUMBUS DAY. They still "celebrate" that? Like, really?

I could have left the POS Saturn on the street as it were...but they are cleaning the streets today, so not to incur a parking ticket, the car had to be moved. Thankfully, my buddy came over to help out. But when we went to pull the spare out of the trunk, we found, and I'm NOT joking, 40-45 empty bottles of beer.

These were not mine (I prefer cans of shitty beer to glass bottle of micro brews). Three times over, I thought I removed all of them, but again, and again, and yet again, my buddy kept finding more. Just for fuck's sake, I texted my bro's girlfriend/the owner of the car and said bottles, she claimed she was intending to recycle them. Like, really? I hardly doubt that excuse would work out if I had been pulled over by the police.

Not as a direct result, but overall, I'm honestly considering moving the FUCK out of Chicago. I've way exceeded my threshold for fucking bullshit. Although, having said that, I fear more bullshit will be waiting for me wherever I might relocate.


Giant Butters said...

Total Bullshit!!

When does the sling/cast come off?

Come visit me in DC, but trust me: you don't want to move here. Definitely worse here than Chicago (have I mentioned I miss Chicago??)!

Dane said...

GODDAMN! That sucks! Maybe you should just get a different brother.

Anonymous said...

I'm afraid I can't let you do that. Plus, where would you move? "Guy from Sioux Falls" or "Guy from Wasilla" just don't have the same ring to them.

You know Chicago's the place to be ;).

x's and o's,

A-Gay in Chi

Dean Grey said...


Hmmm, she was going to recycle them? That sounds plausible to me!

Sorry you had a shitty day but the main thing is that you made it through okay.

Bullshit WILL follow you wherever you go. Only relocate for the right reasons. Escaping your troubles isn't good enough.

Think it through yet!


Caleb said...

Hey Justin - I left Chicago a year ago for Denver. And it is just not the same.

There aren't many cities in America where you will have access to all that you have in Chicago. That city just gets inside of you.


Anonymous said...


Bullshit you know, always trumps unknown bullshit.

Chicago. It's not just America's greatest city...it's like having a PhD in coping skills!


dan said...

hey justin, hang in there, I know you love that city. hope the shoulder gets back to normal soon. later.

The New Me said...

Bullshit has a way of tracking people down, I'll never understand how that works. But you and Chicago apart? Nah!

Windy City Sex blog said...

You can run but you can't hide from things. Sometimes change is a good thing sometimes it is just change.

borg_queen said...

Justin, America is about to become 3rd world. Investors are abandoning the dollar.

Why? Cause the Fed won't raise interest rates.

Why? Cause they can't.

Why? Cause it will hurt businesses trying to survive the economy.

Google it. It's all over Time, Bloomberg, etc...

Double whammy I tell ya. If you want to ride out this new reality by being in a major city, at least you can't say I didn't warn ya...

Anonymous said...

Justin.. shitty day..

borg_queen: I follow what you say but we are still the largest consumer of goods in the world. It will be hard to let us fail as it will cause the failure of most of the world's economy's along with ours... nothing is simple but I agree we have done some extreme damage to our standard of living..