LAID BACK/SHAGGY

Do you remember the first time(s) you walked into a drug store or a Wal-Mart or whatever and bought condoms, and it you felt all weird about it? I did too. Ugh, and buying lube, I'd always buy something else to obscure these items from the people that might be in front or behind me in line. God...I'm such a Catholic.

Anyways, I could give a fuck about purchasing such items anymore; that being said, I was at Target today (and on a whim I got an eye exam - no fucking shit - and got contacts! WOOT) and the single item in my cart that caused me to be embarrassed was this:

Allow me to try to explain...my hair seems to mirror the phases of the moon, and I'm sick of it being so short all the time. It's been 6+ weeks since it was last cut, and it's in the 'in-between" phase and I thought this might help. I wondered the hair care aisle for far too long and this was the logical conclusion I came to.

If I don't get it at least trimmed by Thanksgiving, I'm sure someone will tell me my hair is pissing them off (my best guess is my future sister-in-law), but for now, I'm going with it.

THIS SONG DEFINES ME

Every so often a song comes along that gets so stuck in my mind that I like to think it was written for yours truely. At the least, this should have been written for me. Also, I want to RAWK THE SHIT out of Jarvis Cocker's world.  

I love your body 'cause I've lost my mind

If you want someone to talk to, you're wasting your time

If you want someone to share your life, you need someone who is alive

And if every relationship is a two-way street, I have been screwing in the back whilst you drive

I never said I was deep, but I am profoundly shallow

My lack of knowledge is vast, and my horizons are narrow

I never said I was big, I never said that I was clever

And if you're waiting to find what's going on in my mind, you could be waiting forever

Forever and ever

I can dance you to the end of the night 'cause I'm afraid of the dark

I have to confess I'm out of my depth

You're going over my head and straight through my heart

Some girls like to play it dirty, some girls want to be your mum

Me, I disrespected you whilst we were waiting for the taxi to come

My morality is shabby, my behaviour unacceptable

No, I'm not looking for a relationship, just a willy receptacle

I never said I was

I never said I was

I never said I was

I never said I was deep, but I am profoundly shallow

My lack of knowledge is vast, and my horizons are narrow

I never said I was big, I never said that I was clever

And if you're waiting to find what's going on in my mind, you could be waiting forever

Forever and ever

I never said I was deep, but I am profoundly shallow

My lack of knowledge is vast, and my horizons are narrow

I never said I was deep