Friday, September 4, 2009


Right before I sat down to write this, the above title magically popped into my head. Which is notable because, it's a more than apt definition of the 2 Night Party to Wrap My 20's, and also because I'm surprised I can even string a sentence together after all the brain cells I carelessly expended through a combination of various controlled substances, copious amounts of booze and beer. Oh, and my ears have returned to normal, so there's always that!

First, let's begin with the venue. The entire structure is temporary; the stage, seating, concessions and the even the bathrooms look like they can all be removed in a matter of hours. Or if tornado came through, it would probably deposit the whole fucking place right into Lake Michigan. But the view! Holy Shit it was AWESOME! Here's a crappy cell phone picture taken from the very last row:

Although my buddy that bought the tickets paid more for floor seats (good ones too, near the stage) we/I opted to spend the majority of both nights way the hell in the back (I think he may have been a little pissed about that) but the view was so much better. See the crappy cell phone picture below for proof.

It also sounded better in the back, not too mention there actually more than 5" of space in which to boogie. AND - we had a big group of us all together. Friends old and new, we owned a decent piece of real estate and no one fucked with us (you could also smoke with abandon up there), which was a good thing because...

...both nights I tripped my nuts off. Oh mushrooms, how I love thee. Yes, they taste like shit, because, you know, THEY ARE GROWN IN SHIT. However, dear, sweet Gloria somehow got her hands on Mushroom Chocolates, which masked the shit taste rather well. Thankfully, she stopped me right as I was going to put a way-too-big-piece in my mouth, and she suggested I break it in half. Had I eaten the whole thing, I would probably be in a psych ward.

I guess now is as good as time as any to thank Gloria, not just for the 'Shrooms, but also for the enormous hickey she implemented on my neck. She gave me a mild one on Tuesday, which was sore the next day, but didn't leave a mark.

When I informed her of this on Wednesday night, she was determined to correct that oversight. I should kept my mouth shut. See, she's bigger than me, probably stronger too, and when she wrapped her arms around me and bite into my neck, I couldn't let go. Maybe it's because I struggled a bit, or maybe she's part vampire, but this second hickey BROKE THE SKIN prompting me to bleed on the collar of my mostly white shirt. Thanks babe!

Now let's move onto the GIRL THAT WANTED MY NUTS. Cate is a friend of Gloria. When I arrived on Wednesday, Cate practically jumped into my arms and landed a big wet one, right on the kisser. Mind you, we have never met before this evening. As the night wore on, she kept it up, and at one point said "you're so pretty!" Now, I've been called a lot of things, but never that, so I'm going to chalk it up to the drugs in her system. Don't get me wrong, she was totally adorable and sweet; generous too.

At one point, ate shoves her empty hand in my face and says "take this". Take what? I look closer and she that the first knuckle of her index finger is caked in white powder. "It's good Molly [MDMA]!" So I did as instructed and...yeah...sucked on her finger, thus delivering another substance into my bloodstream. Whew-boy!

Oh, and I have a standing invitation to visit her and her friends in Alabama for more Widespread Panic concerts next month. A weekend in a beach house on the Gulf coast seems super dope and all, but I won't be going. Either she didn't understand me telling her I'm into dudes, or she didn't care. Either way...Cate rawks! As do the other 10 or so people I met and partied with. Gotta love those hippie's!

The music was most excellent as well. The Allman Brothers, while consummate musicians, didn't really light a fire under my ass, at least not like Widespread Panic still can. At some during Panic's set on Tuesday night, I was peaking from the 'Shrooms and it felt like the band was INSIDE my fucking head. I was also told at one point to "let JB (their lead singer) handle the vocal duties". Good. Damn. RAWK.

So - now that I have mostly recovered, and shed the official age of 29 - it's time to ring in YEAR 3-0 with my buddies tonight! Hope you all have a fun, rawkin' and safe Labor Day weekend! Cheers.


The New Me said...


Dave said...

Happy Birthday fella. Hope you have a good one and enjoy the substances.


Dean Grey said...

Ooooooh, that view of the Chicago skyline looks lovely!

I feel nauseous reading about all those drugs and I'm not the one who even consumed them!

G-L-O-R-I-A, I don't how I feel about you giving one of your good friends drugs to play with but I do think it was nice that you watched out for Justin and broke the slightly-too-big mushroom in half. *sigh*

Here's to hoping 'Justin v.30' is the best version yet!!



Mike said...

Happy Birthday! Always enjoy reading about your adventures!

Dean Grey said...

So Justin....

What exactly does "A Fire Sale of Fun" actually mean/refer to?

After thinking about it I must know!


JUSTIN said...

@Dean...think of a retail store stocked with WAY too much fun, and they're slashing prices!

Dean Grey said...



Those must've been some powerful 'shrooms! Hahaha.


M&M said...

mmmm MOLLY!!

Anonymous said...

Dean- In my younger days, I was practically a professional drug taker. So believe me when I say I would never give Justin anything that would hurt him in the long term, and mushrooms are about as safe a drug as there is out there. I prefer to do my damage to his sweet, sweet nipples. But seriously now- Justin is fuuuuun when he's in an altered state. F.U.N. And Jus-tan, your nuts were perfectly safe. "Cate"'s boyfriend was there the whole time. She just likes to love people up. And regarding the hickey- You're welcome. I try to be a good friend.