Tuesday, July 21, 2009


Sometimes I tend to go on...let's call them tangents, in which I find something so ridiculously amusing that I simply cannot stop myself from bringing it up again and again. Of course, if the person(s) I am with egg me on, well, there's almost no stopping me.

Case in point: On Sunday afternoon I was with my friend Josh at the Pitchfork Festival (I'll write about that soon). We were both high as all hell and about 6 beers deep when Josh said something like "...hey brah...there sure a lot of brahs here, brah..." to which I responded "...BRAH! I know, it's like a BRAH-B-Q!".

This continued for far too long. But before I get into it further, I realize that not everyone might not know what a "BRAH" is, so I thought it would be helpful to include a visual aid (see below).

That would be the Godfather/Patron Saint of Brahs' everywhere, Brody Jenner (or as I like to refer to him "BRAH-dy Jenner". He's actually a rare breed of Brah, in that he is equal parts Brah and world-class-douche-bag. Remember his show "Bromance"? Neither do I. Let's move on...

Anyways, so the "BRAH" tangent continued on as a sort of question and answer session, in which I would ask Josh certain questions, and then answer them (yes...I know answering your questions makes me a loser, but so be it). Here's the ones I can remember:

Q: Where does a BRAH go on vacation?
A: The BRAH-hamas!

Q: What's a BRAH's favorite series of detective books?
A: The Hardy BRAHS!

Q: What kind of sausage does a BRAH prefer?
A: BRAH-t-wurst!

Q: Who is the favorite German composer of BRAH's everywhere?
A: BRAH-m!

Q: Where can you find a BRAH in New York City?
A: BRAH-d-way!

Q: What's a TITS song for BRAH's everywhere to rock out to while driving?
A: "Red BRA(c)H-cetta" by Rush!

Q: If you're a true BRAH what drink would you order from the bar?
A: Vodka and Red BRAH!

Q: If a BRAH was a snake, what kind would he be?
A: BRAH-ah constrictor!

Q: What's the favorite chemical element of BRAH's everywhere?
A: BRAH-mine!

Q: Who is the basketball player that all BRAH's seek to emulate?
A: James La-BRAH-on!

That's all I can remember at this point, but I assure you, there were at least a dozen more. Once we were snorting beer through our noses and manically giggling like school girls, and thus attracting the attention of those around us, we decided to stop (but I could have kept going!). Whew. I'll be here all week folks. Please remember to tip the wait staff.


Thomas said...

If I had to sit through that conversation, I would have slapped you -

Slapped you with luv.

Dean Grey said...


Q: What's a BRAH's favorite cable channel?

A: BRAH-vo!

Oh, and Brody Jenner may be a rich-do-nothing-douche-bag but he still is extremely handsome!!


Cockbag LLC said...

I would have bitch slapped you for any of those horrible comments. This is coming from someone who ended a potential relationship because the person said ahunt instead of aunt (like ant).

Caleb said...

Good post, brah.

But you need to watch some more hoops. ;-}