Thursday, May 6, 2010

I GUESS THE UNIVERSE LIKES ME AFTER ALL

So...in the last 24 hours the universe has rewarded me with a modest raise, another 2 shifts and a 3AM booty call. I can't make this shit up. I was steering clear of my favorite co-worker since she quit smoking 2 days ago, being the sensible guy I am, I played the loudest, most dirty hip-hop I had on my iPhone, and did shots of whiskey with the kitchen staff.

Around this time I get a text from this guy I haven't seen or heard from in at least 2 years. He's all hot and horny to hang out, and he had weed, so why not chill at 4am? He looked good too...cute, skinny black dude at least 8 years my junior.

Anyways...I forgot that my current Roomie is throwing a bachelorette party at out place tonight; the shit is all dolled up like a fucking whorehouse, she even broke a $20 into singles, it's sitting on my kitchen table. In 10 hours a greasy, presumably nasty male stripper will be violating my sacred man cave...but I digress.

Dude comes over, it's like 4-ishAM, we got stoned and start making out and removing each other's pants. I was a good boy, so was he, and we kept it PG-13; still, we both jerked each other off at 8am this morning, I blew a HUGE fucking load all over the place, saw him out, and proceeded to smoke a smoke on my porch...and my landlord is standing "Good Morning Justin!" there...and I'm wondering if he can spot the dried cum on my forehead.

[Shakes head] I need a drink. And a shower.

4 comments:

Billy said...

Hip Hip Hooray!

Aaron said...

awesomeeeee!

Ian said...

This really made me LOL. Go Justin!

Dean Grey said...

Gross Justin!!

-Dean