Monday, December 8, 2008

AN UNSETTLED MIND

Let's back up to last night when, despite my being exhausted at 11PM, I didn't go to bed until 3:45AM. Sleep did not arrive for some time though, as I tossed and turned for about 2 hours before falling asleep. Said sleep was not peaceful though, as I had several deeply unsettling "dreams" that caused me to wake up more than once, totally soaked in sweat.

One of said dreams involved fucking the son of my former boss (who, as it turns out, is becoming a regular character in my dream life). And that was the most normal dreams that I can remember. Most of which seem to revolve around money and sex, both of which I am deeply starved for as of late, so it makes a certain kind of sense, I suppose.

Around Noon I was woken up by a call from my father who informed that will be staying with me for a few days for Christmas. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my Dad, very much, but his situation is even more precarious than mine and the last few times we spoke on the phone, I had to force myself to keep upbeat. More for him than for me, and GAWD, that is a fucked situation to be put in.

Still, I pulled my ass out of bed. Not only was I expecting to get news about a job offer, I was also planning on a going on a "unofficial" date of sorts tonight. Little things like that have been pulling through as of late, but not one, but both fell through, and I'm left really fucking depressed.

FUCK.

I could go on and on with bitching and moaning, but I'll spare anyone reading this, and retire to the TV room and play a game called "let's drink enough whiskey to black out or puke".

Cheers...

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey buddy - ex-Chicago guy here, now in Seattle. Take care of yourself, man. I know Chicago is known for drinking (Christ knows I drank a lot there!) but be careful with it, ok? We like reading your posts too much. Plus what's this about getting no ass?

samuel said...

I read your blog but never comment, but I have to tonight just to say, damn! I'm sorry. I hope things get better soon.

Bruce said...

Justin you need a swift kick in the ass. Get out of that apartment and go jogging, walking, to the gym...something to get some exercise. Get those endorphines flowing and that will help you feel better. Maybe you should try finding a nice sugardaddy. Older guys can be fun too and very appreciative if you know what I mean...I'm just saying!!! Check out Daddyhunt.com, you never know.

Anonymous said...

Bruce, That is EXACTLY what I have been telling him... Look, Justin, he's a grown-up, and I'm awesome, so you really should listen to us. Excercise and a sugar daddy will make it all better. Love your bitchass. ~Gloria~

Anonymous said...

Hang in there bud!

Thomas said...

I don't think your internet fans, including myself, are going to allow to take this slow road to shit-dom.

You'll find new work soon, you'll get more sex soon and things will get better.

Silly Billy said...

You need a little trip to NY - make your dad pay!