Friday, December 5, 2008

THE MOST DISGUSTING THING I HAVE EVER PUT IN MY MOUTH

Last night I saw a concert at the Vic with a few buddies. It's one of my favorite venues, with the exception of the beer selection. You have 2 choices, pay $5 for a Miller product, or $6 for a Corona. And these are not drafts, these are cans. Ugh. Anyways, since I am a beer whore I made due with Miller High Life, the "Champagne of Beers". Midway through the set my friend passed me a beer to drink. After taking a giant gulp, my face twisted into a knot and I struggled not to expel the offensive liquid from my mouth. Had there not been people on all sides of me, I probably would have.

The offender? Miller Genuine Draft Light 64, which according to Miller: "no other beer on the market has lower calories". At 64 calories, they are probably right. And it's the most disgusting thing I have EVER put in my mouth. It tastes like what I imagine it would taste like if R. Kelly decided to piss in my mouth, mixed with a teaspoon of cinnamon. It has a finish similar to battery acid..and the smell. OMG! The fucking smell! You know what tuna salad from Subway smells like? Yeah, kinda like that.

On the plus side, the concert was the SHIT! I had never before heard of Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings, but a few hours before the show my buddy (thanks man!) offered me a free ticket. Gawd-Damn am I happy that I accepted, as this was the coolest show I have seen in some time. It's not often that one gets to hear & see a 9-piece band fronted by a woman with such an astonishing voice, and I consider myself one lucky guy for having been able to see this show.


5 comments:

Fancy Pants said...

you dog, that must have been some show!!!! Well worth some Miller 64 in your mouth. They should have at least called it Miller 69 -- there are a lot of not-so-great flavors we will swallow if it has to do with sex . . .

Devyn said...

I've had some pretty disgusting things in my mouth, but I will take it from you that this is worse.

jeremy said...

love the song!

K said...

Why did you have to bring cinnamon into this bb?

Le sigh

Doghigh said...

I'm a huge fan for a while now. LOVE, love them!!!! A HELL of a show, right?