MY SHOES SPIT HOT FIRE

FOR weeks now I've been planning a proper Viking Funeral for my beloved Adidas Supermods; these currently out of production sneakers have done so much more for me than I ever could have expected. But it was time they go, and I wanted to send them off right.

So I did the only slightly reasonable thing I know how to do: my friend and I took them to the back alley behind my place, doused them with butane, and they those fuckers BURN.

However, these shoes are apparently indestructible! We let them burn for a few minutes before a car was coming down the ally (also I seem to remember a Police passing on a nearby street) so we had to stomp them out.

Now I plan on framing them as a "monument" of sorts. Maybe Neal can help me mount them within a Lucite box; it's cheesy but these shoes mark a significant chapter in my life, and I'm very reluctant to let them go. Likewise, I'm sure.